WHAT THE HELL IS THAT? Its a CONCH SHELL JESUS LAMP

There is only one thing I love more than finding great vintage pieces in thrift stores - finding hideous unidentifiable objects that sometimes look homemade. This conch shell Jesus lamp is absolutely glorious. GLORIOUS. I stumbled upon it at Get Dressed in Raleigh on Sunday while browsing around with my friend Jackie. We both stared at it for several seconds like deer in headlights - tiny bulb headlights inset in large conch shells that is. Neither of us knew what to say. I wanted to look away, but I just couldn’t. I mean, the craftsmanship was unlike anything I had ever seen. Never being one to pass up items so ugly they make babies’ faces melt off, I started reasoning with myself as to why I should buy it. At one point I even told myself that maybe, just maybe if I spend the $12 asking price, I could later take it to the Antiques Road Show where the appraiser would tell me it was an original piece made by some dude named like Hilton Burnshaw, father of the Organic Homemade Lamp Movement of the 1970s and that it was really worth $1.7 million.